Funny Jokes

Funny Jokes category gives you a lots of fun and entertainment.This category contains very short funny jokes.





In a restaurant:

Customer: Waiter, waiter! There is a frog in my soup!!!

Waiter: Sorry, sir. The fly is on vacation.

On a crowded bus, one man noticed that another man had his eyes closed.

"What's the matter? Are you sick?" he asked.

"No, I'm okay. It's just that I hate to see old ladies standing." 

Patient: Doctor, I think that I've bitten by a vampire. Doctor: Drink this glass of water.

Patient: Will it make me better?

Doctor: No, I but I'll be able to see if your neck leaks.

A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up.

"Wow!," said her father, "That was short. You usually talk for two hours. What happened?"

"Wrong number," replied the girl.

A: Why are you crying?
B: The elephant is dead.

A: Was he your pet?

B: No, but I'm the one who must dig his grave

Teacher: Why are you late?

Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill.

Teacher: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it?

Student: No. I was standing on it.

Boyfriend: What is your favorite music group?

Girlfriend: I love U2!

Boyfriend: I love you too, but what is your favorite music group?

I thought of suicide,
Went to railway tracks but
Got Ur sms and after reading
I thought to be alive, U inspired me because
If a useless person like U is alive, why should I die. 

                                  Heaven is when u have:
                                  A german car,
                                  American salary,
                                  Chinese food &
                                  Indian wife!
                                  Hell is when:
                                  Car is chinese,
                                  Food is german,
                                  Wife is american &
                                  Salary is indian!

                                U r 100% beautiful,
                                U r 100% lovely,
                                U r 100% sweet,
                                U r 100% nice, and
                                U r 100% stupid to believe these words.