Teacher: Did you father help your with your homework?
The teacher to a student: Conjugate the verb "to walk" in simple present.
The student: I walk. You walk ....
The teacher intruptes him: Quicker please.
The student: I run. You run ...
Little Johnny: Teacher, can I go to the bathroom?
Teacher: Little Johnny, MAY I go to the bathroom?
Little Johnny: But I asked first!
A teacher asked a student to write 55.
Student asked: How?
Teacher: Write 5 and beside it another 5!
The student wrote 5 and stopped.
teacher: What are you waiting for?
student: I don't know which side to write the other 5!
PUPIL: "Would you punish me for something I didn`t do?"
TEACHER:" Of course not."
PUPIL: "Good, because I haven`t done my homework."
Headmaster: I've had complaints about you, Johnny, from all your teachers. What have you been doing?
Johnny: Nothing, sir.
Headmaster: Exactly.
Son: Dad, what is an idiot?
Dad: An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can't understand him. Do you understand me?
Son: No
Q: Why did the man throw a bucket of water out the window?
A: He wanted to see the waterfall.
Q: Why did the man throw the butter out the window?
A: He wanted to see the butterfly.
Q: Why did the man put the clock in the safe?
A: He wanted to save time.
One day an English grammar teacher was looking ill.
A student asked, "What's the matter?"
"Tense," answered the teacher, describing how he felt.
The student paused, then continued, "What was the matter? What has been the matter? What might have been the matter... ?"
Dad : When I beat u how do u control your anger.
Son : I start cleaning toilet.
Dad : how does that satisfy you?
Son : I clean with your tooth brush.
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